If tonight is anything like last night...

it's going to be amazing.

It's so fun being apart of a festival, especially like Moontower.  It's one of those festivals that you know people are there  because they really enjoy the shows they are seeing.  It's like going to a comic con, or any con, in the sense that are you surrounded by liked minded people.

Although, since there are some pretty big names headlining the festival and they are on big networks, you also get the audience members who just know these actors/stand-ups from those shows.  A lot of the times the actor is not the same as the stand-up. 

I also noticed that your topics of conversation tend to revolve around the festival itself.  I never realized this before because I'm such a film nerd that I'm always talking about films.  Granted, I talk a lot about comedy as well, but that's besides the point.  I noticed that last night my conversations were about what comics we liked, what bits where our favorite, even which comics we've seen (which oddly enough sounded like I was bragging).  It makes complete sense though, you talk about what's around you.

So far my experience at the festival has been nice.  It's hard to have an entire feel for the festival after only one show, and you also have to take into consideration that they are going to have growing pains that every first year festival goes through.  Above it all though, I'm excited to be a part of it.

Tonight promises to be just as awesome, maybe even more so.  I have an idea of what to see, as my OCD organized person likes, but I'm also leaving it up to whatever strikes my fancy at the crucial decision time.  That's a brilliant element of a festival, and also their downfall, so many choices!

Today is the Day

Moontower Comedy and Oddity Festival starts today.  I'm so excited.  Comedy, yay! 

Our first show is going to be Maria Bamford.  I can't wait.  I remember watching one of her specials, years ago, and I have to admit, I didn't like it.  It's not necessarily that I couldn't get her comedy, I couldn't get over her voice (which I know probably wasn't her real one).  I've grown as a comedy nerd, and I'm pretty sure I can re-evaluate her stand-up routine.  That, and everyone freaking loves her.  If all the people I love, comics and fellow nerds, love her, there's got to be something to her.  I'm excited to revisit her stand-up and hopefully board the Maria Bamford train.

After that, I think we might try to get into Aziz.  I'm not sure, but that's what the original plan that I had mocked up would be.  Of course, we'll discuss it, Jessica-Clayton-myself, and figure out what we want to do, and what we can possibly get into.  (ah, the damn annoyance of festivals)  But, come on,  you know Aziz Ansari is going to be badass!  I've seen a bit of his stand-up and loved it. 

There will be a bit of pressure on me this week, which I don't mind, cause I'm definitely the biggest comedy nerd out of the three of us.  I will be leading the charge on what shows to catch, or who we have make sure we see.  It will be kind of fun to organize the raid for the next few days.  I just hope they like it as much as I know I'm going to.

Let's be honest, though, have you seen the list of comics?  It's an awesome list, any show is going to be badass!

So excited!  I love when work and my nerd traits collide. 

A New Chapter

These last two years have been a roller coast ride in life.  So many things have happened, some for the good and a lot for the bad.  I'm still working through the bad elements, and not sure if I'll ever fully recover, but that's okay.  Maybe one day I'll express it on here, it's something that people go through all the time, but it's still being worked out in my head and can't release it.

On the much bright side, things have been great in the career area.
I am now writing for a wonderful online magazine Austin Fusion Magazine.  It's been a great experience and I can't wait for things to continue to grow.

The other "crew" members are awesome and we have a great time together.  It's fun to be around people, it's fun to do things.  It's always a good thing when your co-workers are cool and you enjoy hanging out with them.

It's also been a great writing exercise for me.  I'm used to writing stories, creating this new world with situations and characters.  Now I'm writing interviews and descriptive pieces.  It's not that I'm horrible at it (my April interviews were awesome, if I do say so myself), it's just taken a few articles to feel totally comfortable in my new writing role. 

Viva Latino has also taken on a new life.  We have hooked up with iLatino.tv, and will be airing the new season, as well as starting a Fitness Channel.  It should be up and running by this summer, and I can't wait!  The girls at iLatino are amazing, and it's going to be a great venture for all involved.

It's an interesting time in my life, that's for sure.
Looking forward to all that's involved.

Speaking of which, check back this week for recaps of the upcoming Moontower Comedy and Oddity Festival.  Austin Fusion Magazine will be covering it (don't forget to read the article in the May issue of the magazine), and I'm so excited!  Comedians!  Awesome.

2012

Happy New Year!
I can't believe it's already 2012. Time seems to be going faster and faster as the years go by. I can't say I'm sad to see 2011 go, but I wasn't happy for it's quickness either.

2011 for me was a year of some very low lows, and some equally high highs.
It's funny how life can tend to do that. Maybe it does that on purpose, balancing out your existence and experiences to help in shaping a well-rounded human being. Or maybe things just happened to happen that way.

2011 set up a very interesting 2012. I know that this year will bring, going to stay positive, some of my best moments. I can feel them coming. I know that this will be the year that things really start growing within my career. 2011 did a good job with dropping some varied projects into my lap, of which I'm stoked! Yet, at the same time, whether I want to admit it or not, I'm afraid that this year might also be the hardest moments of my life. I want to stay positive and think that things will sustain, but I can't be selfish. So again, highs and lows are what is for seen in 2012.

With the shift that my life seems to be gravitating towards in 2012, I feel calm about things. Maybe this is a good thing. Maybe more good than bad will occur this year. Maybe it's my avoidance of reality that's kicking in. Maybe it'll be a year of acceptance as well as advancement.

I'm trying not to picture the year, or whatever time increment you want to use, is a positive or negative light, instead I'm focusing on taking things as they happen. It's not that the universe is for or against me, things just happen. Instead of focusing on what will happen, I just need to focus on my present and make sure that I'm happy and doing what I can, when I can.

That is my resolution, after all. To steal Chris Hardwick's line from "The Nerdist Way" (you should pick it up, fa sho!); Don't be a pawn for the darkness. It's a good life philosophy, but one step at a time.
I want to be a better person. Not that I think I'm a horrible person, cause I'm pretty rad, but there is always areas of my life that need to be worked on. All of us have those areas, so why not make a conscience effort to evolve.

Life is evolving everyday, from new career paths to a change in family. The only way you can experience the fullness of life to absorb everything, let it breath within your bones, and then incorporate it into your being. This seems like it would be the logical thing to do, however we tend to let our emotions take control over our thoughts and effect how we react. I'm a very emotional person, sometimes a person who relies on emotional contact, so not making it about my emotions is going to be a challenge. Instead, for every bad thing that makes me want to hide under my blanket for a week, I'm going to focus on the good in my life. It's all about balance.

A life of balance. That's not a bad resolution/goal to strive for either in 2012. I hope I'm able to attain/stick with my resolutions.
It's a new year, anything is possible.

I don't know what's wrong with me.

I don't know how many times I've talked about keeping up with this blog, especially since I'm actually a contributing writer to different things, yet I don't ever do it. I can't keep making excuses for myself. This time around, I was just lazy. I would of much rather listened to my podcasts and crochetted the Christmas presents for people. I'm promise it will happen less. (uh...)

As it gets closer to Christmas, I'm starting to concentrate on not getting stressed. This year I will be visiting my father and step-mom for the holidays. I'm looking forward to seeing and spending time with my dad. We've gotten closer in the last few years, and I do enjoy our time together.
It's not going to be as stress-free as it has been in times past, due to situations, but I'm focusing on the positive in hopes that positive energy wreaks havoc on the wicked.

It's always interesting spending Christmas with my father because he's not a big Christmas celebrator, never has been. I, on the other hand, love the holiday. I love decorating and spending time with those you love, buying personal gifts for people (I take gift giving very seriously). It's my family holiday. I don't even know if the house will be decorated. Not that I'm complaining, cause I would never. I am very happy and looking forward to seeing my dad, I'm just stating the fact that it's going to be different.

One other thing that I'm looking forward to and focusing on is New Years Eve. I will be away from friends, which is always a blow out, and will be with family. New Years Eve is one of my favorite friend holidays (along with Halloween). (I'm the nerd that dresses up in awesome things...that no one gets.) So, yes, selfishly I'm going to miss the drunken crazy of that night downtown. However, and a BIG HOWEVER, I not only will be with my father, who's birthday it will be, but I will be with not one, but both of my siblings. The first time in like 23 years. I'm serious, 23 years. Maybe ever, but that is a little unlikely. (not by much)

Oh, my siblings. I'm super bffs with my sister, so any time with her is awesome. I'm close to my brother, still looking up to the big bro. When you get the three of us together, which is a rarity, there is no telling what can happen. We've all gotten closer in the last few years, so I'm really excited to just be with them. I can't wait to have that conversation, "What do you mean you don't like Community?" The three nerds together again. Yes, there will be alcohol involved. The best thing about that, my brother will become a comedian himself! OMG, NYE is going to rock.

I may seem to be focusing a little too much on NYE, but I'm focusing on the positive than the negative of what could happen. This holiday season is something that we are all grateful for, one that we won't didn't necessarily know was going to happen, and may not ever again. It's not the easiest situation to go into, but there are enough things that will occur during these two weeks of the holidays to make these the best two weeks of the year.

My family is incredible important to me, and knowing that I will be ending 2011 with all of them means a lot to me. One memory that I know I will cherish for the rest of my life.

Run Away, Run Away...

In my head I picture the Monty Python crew running away from the 'French' castle while barnyard animals are being pelted at them. If only my issue was that funny.

I've realized in recent weeks that when the tough gets going, it takes all of my strength to not run and hide. I attribute this to my youth when I would get the belt for doing something bad. I don't want to imply that I was beat by any means, or that I have a fear of my parents in anyway (they are awesome, actually), but I never liked getting in trouble.

This isn't to say that I'm constantly getting in trouble in my adulthood, I've been quite good thank you. I've grown a lot since I was a child and have gainned strength I never knew I had. Yet, I still want to hide when things go down hill in my life. Like right now, I don't want to face reality.

Maybe that's what it is all about. I don't want to face the possible turn my life could be taking. I know that it's not anything new in the world, and many people, people I hold dear, have had to deal with in their lives, but I don't want it to be a part of mine.
Does that make me selfish? Probabaly, but that doesn't mean it's not any less hard.

This issue isn't something that's new to me, either. It's something that has been in the back of our minds for just about 10 years. The big difference now is that there might not be any more treatment options. That is the scariest thing and my worst fear. It's really hard not to shut down and question whether it's all worth it.

When issues like this happen to you, you find yourself questioning everything. What's the point in doing this if this person won't see it? Why do this if it isn't going to be anything more than an experience. It's hard not to fall into a huge depression pit. I let myself feel this way, I think it's healthy, for a few days. Usually I start to pick myself back up and move on. This time around, it's taking even more strength than usual.

I'm not really accomplishing my goal of movement, to be honest. I'm forcing myself to do things daily. I know it's not healthy, but until I know what my future path will be, I'm in limbo myself. That's what's the worst thing about this situation at the moment, we don't even know if there is or isn't any opions available to us.

I know that I will only run away so far. I can't completely check out. For one, I need to be there for him. I really believe that he gains strength from me, and I can't let him down, not now. I also know that if I let go of the rope while being in the pit, I could be done for. I don't know if I'm ready to give up. So, I continue on this battle and hopefully come out on top, not matter how appealing the hidden cubby-hole looks.

Back to Normal

I never thought I would be a schedule type of person, but there is something to say about having a daily routine.

October was a busy buys month for me.
First off, my dear friends got married. It was a beautiful wedding. It was at a vineyard just north of Austin, and we ended up staying in a hotel.

Yep, we after after partied there. Not too long, since we have a long night at the wedding. Before we went to the wedding we got some drinks, however they didn't have a liquor store close by, so we had to get malt beverages at the gas station. It was pretty hilarious.

As for the wedding itself, it was full of dancing, tears, smiles; a great time with great friends. That's one of the good things about going to a wedding of your close friends, when everyone you know will be there. My whole group of bffs, The IC, was there (half involved) so the night was one of the best nights we have all been together. At the end of the night, we even got the most amazing picture we have ever taken! I love this picture.

After the wedding, 4 days after the wedding, was the Austin Film Festival. I love this festival. It is always full of amazing movies and great panels. This year I got to see The Artist, The Rum Diary, Coriolanus. The panels I went to were Showrunners; Zombies, Apes, and Vampires; and Producing Outside the Norm. A week full of crazy. My highlight, meeting Martin Starr. He's so cool. (and Johnny Depp is awesomely rad!) To read more of my thoughts, go to www.austinfusionmagazine.com and see my November article.

Halloween. I love Halloween. It's one of my favorite holidays, my favorite friend holiday for sure. This year I went as Lucy and my bff went as Ricky. We looked amazing.
We spent the Saturday of Halloween at house parties, which was a nice change from the crazy of downtown. (And I didn't get super upset at the stupid sexy bag costumes.) I don't want to say it has anything to do with my age, cause I still like to party downtown, but I like the idea of house parties for events. We need to have more of those.

A few of us also went to a haunted house. I'm not the scary easily type of person, so it became very clear to me that I don't ever have to go to one of these. Sure, the anticipation of something jumping out at you was scarier than the things that actually jumped out at you. I also think that if you go in a large group, you're screwed. You hear the people ahead of you scream, so you know something is coming your way and you brace yourself. If it was with a smaller group, just you and the friends that came with you, it would be so much better. However, this would mean they would take FOREVER and you'd be waiting in line longer than the tour of the house itself. You really want to scare me, take me to a real haunted house and lets just hang out. No bueno.

November is now upon us. I wish it was colder outside, but it's a calmer month for me. I do have things coming up, but most of it is 'work at home' stuff so I can handle that with ease (and at work when we're slow) instead of running around town. This also starts the Xmas shopping time. I love shopping for my family, so this is never a chore. I have most of my ideas done, so that's good, and the others will come when they come.
I also have a wedding of a great friend of mine coming up. I can't wait to attend, but it's a simple wedding, and I already have my outfit, and there really aren't wedding gifts to get. It's just going to be a day together. Awesome.
I'm also working on articles for both Austin Fusion Magazine and Viva Latino (as well as attend the Wizard World Con), so I have a lot of 'work' coming up.

Okay, so it seems that November will be a full month too. Bring it on!